“The Brené Brown of Pain”
—Alie Ward, host of the Ologies podcast
Dr. Rachel Zoffness, a renowned pain psychologist, neuroscientist, and the author of the bold new book TELL ME WHERE IT HURTS: The New Science of Pain and How to Heal (March 24, Grand Central).
Headaches, stomachaches, and amplified body pain in kids are not always “all in their head”, nor are they simply a physical issue. They are often signs of pediatric chronic pain, an epidemic affecting roughly one in three children, that is frequently misunderstood, misdiagnosed, and over-medicated.
Parents are often left feeling helpless when a purely biomedical approach (medication, procedures) fails their child. Instead, TELL ME WHERE IT HURTS provides parents with the long-overdue, science-backed roadmap for healing: the Biopsychosocial Model.
This model reveals that pain is produced by a combination of biological, psychological, and social factors, and an effective treatment must target all three.
Dr. Zoffness cuts through the confusion with a customizable Pain Protocol, including actionable, accessible takeaways and strategies for parents, such as:
- Pain is Not Always Damage: Learn how chronic pain is often a hyper-sensitive alarm in the brain, not a sign of ongoing tissue damage, and how to communicate this hopeful truth to your child
- Adverse Childhood Experiences (ACEs) as a Pain Risk: Exposure to ACEs is a major risk factor for chronic pain; children with one ACE are 60% more likely to have chronic pain, and those with four or more ACEs are 170% more likely.
- Movement is Medicine: Discover the key strategy of Pacing to help kids avoid the “avoidance trap” and gradually reintroduce Joyful Movement – a powerful anti-inflammatory and pain-reducer
- The Pain Dial: Understand the “somatic connection” that shows how stress, anxiety, and depression can act as a Pain Dial, amplifying physical symptoms, and learn first-line treatments to turn the volume down
- The Vicious Sleep Cycle: Get Dr. Zoffness’s top 10 science-backed sleep tips to break the cycle where pain disrupts your child’s sleep and worsens pain
- Nutrition and the Pain Cycle: A quality, nutrient-rich diet with fresh, whole foods helps manage chronic pain and inflammation, while processed foods, excess sugar, and fasting can fuel the Pain Cycle.
- Social Medicine: See why Touch Medicine (like hugs and back rubs) and finding positive Role Models are vital for reducing pain and isolation
TELL ME WHERE IT HURTS empowers parents to become their child’s most effective healer, offering hope and a compassionate, comprehensive plan for families who have been told their child’s pain is “incurable.”
Dr. Zoffness is a leading global pain expert, faculty at UCSF School of Medicine, a Stanford pain science educator, and a Mayday Fellowship winner. She’s been interviewed by leading thinkers like Ezra Klein and her work is widely recognized for making complex neuroscience accessible and actionable.
“This book is a must read for anyone struggling with chronic pain.”
—Anna Lembke, MD, New York Times bestselling author of Dopamine Nation, Stanford University
“For anyone who has ever felt dismissed by the medical community, or told that pain is ‘all in their head,’ Tell Me Where It Hurts finally offers science-based truth: it reconnects physical and emotional pain, validates the reality of suffering, and demonstrates true hope for healing. Brilliant, timely and important.”
—Lori Gottlieb, LMFT, New York Times bestselling author of Maybe You Should Talk to Someone
“If you follow the recommendations in this book, I can assure you that it will change your life.”
—Layne Norton, PhD, Doctor of nutritional sciences, Author of Fat Loss Forever
“In this groundbreaking book, Dr. Zoffness dismantles outdated myths about pain and brilliantly reveals new ways to overcome it. Filled with the latest science, this is a must read for both doctors and patients, and frankly anyone grappling with chronic pain.”
—William W. Li, MD, New York Times bestselling author of Eat To Beat Disease and Eat To Beat Your Diet, former faculty at Harvard Medical School
“The must-have book every doctor and patient didn’t know they were missing. With beautiful stories and practical science, Tell Me Where It Hurts offers a clear and hopeful roadmap for healing chronic pain. Engaging and essential.”
—Judson Brewer, MD, PhD, New York Times bestselling author of Unwinding Anxiety, Brown University
“What if pain isn’t just a signal—but a story your body is trying to tell? In this powerful, compassionate book, Dr. Rachel Zoffness blends science and stories to reveal why pain lingers and what to do when medicine has no answers. As a physician, I was humbled by how much I didn’t know. This book is essential—for anyone living with pain, and for those who care for them.”
—Lisa Sanders MD, New York Times bestselling author of Every Patient Tells a Story, Professor, Yale School of Medicine
About the Author
Dr. Rachel Zoffness MS, PhD is a leading global pain expert, pain psychologist, speaker, author, disruptor and thought-leader in pain medicine. She’s faculty at the UCSF School of Medicine, lectures about pain science at Stanford, and is a winner of the prestigious Mayday Fellowship.